May: a not-in-the-mood-board
Because not everything can be desirable.
To go alongside the lovely things in our May Moodboard, we also thought it would be good to pick out a few things that haven’t tickled our fancy this month.
These are the bad and the ugly. And the Daily Mail.
"I had holes in my jeans well before it was fashionable" Kenny Rogers
It’s a denim-fest this month, as two of the items are particularly hideous jeans. The first from Topshop are a pair of what they describe as ‘cutout mom jeans’ with holes exactly where my hip bones used to be. You'll be glad to know there's no waiting list for these - and excitingly they’re actually reduced to just £10 now - a real bargain.
The second denim-disaster is by Opening Ceremony and the Y/Project who have created a pair of jeans with detachable legs enabling them to turn into minute denim hotpants (finally someone has done it!). Apparently while still attached they flatteringly accentuate your “under-butt” (I think I may have two of these) and come in two different colour washes so you can wear them with everything.
“I like to have a martini,
Two at the very most.
After three I'm under the table,
after four I'm under my host.” Dorothy Parker
Apparently there is such a thing as 'the beauty drink du jour' and Collagin is it. Drink yourself younger - it seems rather sinister to have your gin with a side of collagen, but this is what this is. Frankly after enough regular G&Ts I think I look amazing - beer goggles are far more effective than any youth-laced gin could ever be.
"Spaghetti can be eaten most successfully if you inhale it like a vacuum cleaner." Sophia Loren
Mmm, pasta, wonderful wonderful pasta (you can tell I’m on a low carb phase) - and you turn it into something else? A doughnut. No thank you. A food trend too far by Pop Pasta in Brooklyn. What next - rainbow spaghetti?
“You can never be over dressed or overeducated.” Oscar Wilde
Rompers. For men. Nothing else to say really.
"I know what I need! I need... I need... I need... fish fingers and custard!" Doctor Who
Not exactly an exclusive I'm offering here, but worth a mention regardless: the Daily Mail would make the Not-in-the-mood board every month to be honest, but this was a spectacularly nasty article about mums who tell the truth about the ups and downs of motherhood. And slagged off frozen fishfingers. Ugh.